On Tuesday, Score Atlanta’s Zander Lentz and other members of the media had the opportunity to race go-karts against NASCAR rookie phenom Joey Logano, who made a name for himself in Atlanta. Here is Lentz’s account of the race against “Sliced Bread” himself at Atlanta Motor Speedway.
There he is. He’s a skinny kid. Tall. Lanky. Joey Logano, the future of NASCAR. He looks 12. I’ve got this. I am not a go-kart guy, but I’ve got this. He brought his own helmet. Rookies. I am going to show this guy what it’s all about.
They say his nickname is Sliced Bread. That’s a bad nickname. Earnhardt was the Intimidator. Petty was the King. Bill Elliott was Awesome Bill from Dawsonville. Tony Stewart is Smoke. Even Earnhardt Jr.’s Little E and Jeff Gordon’s Rainbow Warrior are better than Joey’s Sliced Bread. You know what makes sliced bread better? Toasting it. And I’m going to set the toaster on fire burning this kid.
So what? He’s got records at Atlanta Motor Speedway and he drives the Home Depot No. 20 car that Tony Stewart made famous. I have a few Atlanta records of my own: I-285 is just a big road course for me and I win every day. I can get from Hwy 78 to GA 400 in under 15 minutes at rush hour. Try that, Rookie. I dominate Mario Kart. I have been pulled over by the authorities in Tennessee, Kentucky, Georgia, Alabama, Florida, North Carolina, Ohio and California – and not pulled over in many other states that I should have been. Besides, I saw “Days of Thunder” in the theaters when this pup was all of one month old. He’s wet behind the ears and I am going to take him to school on the track. Fourteen consecutive Thursday Thunder wins? Youngest driver ever to start Daytona? Big deal. I’ve got this.
As I am putting a few warm-up laps in to get a feel for the road course at Andretti Indoor Karting—that’s where the smack is going to go down—I see Logano hit the track, Home Depot helmet and all. He squeals his wheels and heads out onto the track at full speed in seconds. I’m feeling good stroking through the hairpin turns on the track and now they bring us in for an official start. Of course, I draw the last row. Logano is in the front. Figures. Looks like I’ll have my work cut out for me.
All of a sudden, Logano jumps the gun. I want to pound the accelerator, but no one in front of me budges. This is too much. I am stuck and I am starting to think that the fix is in. I’ll never catch the guy if he has that much of a head start.
But then again, maybe I will. Joey heads smoothly through the turns and slows as he nears my kart. He pulls in next to me on the back row. He wants to start from the back. This guy might just be OK after all.
Like any great upset, I have a plan. I am going to tuck in behind Logano early, let him do all the work cutting up the field, and when it is just the two of us at the end, I am going to nudge him from behind, get his momentum heading in the wrong direction and sail right past him. Like I said, I’ve got this.
The green flag drops and we are all on the gas at once. I find my place behind Joey’s cart right away. He is easy to spot. We all have black helmets. All of us except Logano, that is. His orange-and-white Home Depot helmet is like a red jersey on a quarterback in training camp. He sticks out like a sore thumb.
Cutting through the pack just like I thought he would, the only problem is that I got cut off so I am not right on his tail. Instead, I am on the tail of some guy I think I know from the television news. He seems to know how to handle himself so I decided to employ the “follow Joey” tactics to this random guy. After a while we are going back and forth trading positions and a few bumps and I am looking for an opening to pass him for good. In and out of turns I am right on him focusing hard on his bumper and the upcoming turns. Finally I have my opening. I turn hard left get into the breaks early and stand on the gas when I feel a tap from the back sending my car off balance. An orange-and-white Depot helmet goes flying past me as I am left to regain my composure and get my car slowly back up to speed. Can’t be. But it is. I’m one lap down and Logano is gone.
I decided to take some time to watch him work through the turns. He doesn’t give up any speed and carves through turns by accelerating. As I feel the front bumper of another driver, I realize I need to pay a little more attention to my own work at hand. I decided to give myself a “re-do.” I am going to wait for Logano to catch up and then I am going to chase him down. Mentally, I have erased the lost lap-and-a-half and now I am up a half lap on the kid. I’ve got this.
This time when Logano comes around (that Depot helmet is impossible to miss), I stick to his bumper like duct tape on a 1989 Buick. I am on his tail and he has to know that this time is a little different than the last time he has flew by me. We head through the first couple of turns on the course and I am still right on him. I am actually starting to look for an opening to pass him and get back my mental lead.
He swings wide and I decided to stand on it and shoot into the gap he left open. Then something happens that seems a bit strange. He slams the car to the left, swings it back to the right, and it seems to be dancing. He is in-and-out of three turns like they were a simple puzzle. His kart makes no squeals, wastes no efforts and loses no speed. He is five or six lengths ahead and growing his lead. I am left to wonder how he did it. It was like his car moved differently than mine. As he pulled away again, I decided to use the remaining time on the track to try and replicate his moves in turns three, four and five.
Over the next three laps I came close to pulling it off. I almost had it. On my last lap I set it up perfectly. I swung wider than was intuitive on the first turn and cut shallower than it seemed necessary in the second turn. Right as I was about to come out in perfect shape for the U-turn that followed the straight away, I felt a bump on my fender and swung too far to the right to carry my momentum out of the third turn. There it was. That orange-and-white helmet. Are you kidding me! Again? This guy is the best thing since … ah! Even the nickname just got cooler. If it is possible to laugh at someone with the back of your head, Logano has it down pat. I’m left thinking the same thing every crazy old man thinks when a punk kid drives by: Slow down!
Mercifully, they waved us in to the pits and the day was over for me. I’ve definitely not got this. But I’m blaming it on my kart. I’ll get him next time.
I think a lot of NASCAR Sprint Cup drivers will have that same feeling this year, because while I may not have it, Logano does. Most likely the only toasting that Sliced Bread will experience will be of the celebratory kind, although he will have to wait a few years for the champagne – after all, he is only 18.
Logano will return to his home track when he drives the #20 Home Depot car for Joe Gibbs Racing in the Kobalt 500 on March 8 at Atlanta Motor Speedway. For ticket info call (877) 9-AMS-TIX or visit www.AtlantaMotorSpeedway.com. Lentz can be reached at zlentz@scoreatl.com.
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